Friday, July 21, 2017

IDK

I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I wake up, go through the motions and then, what? 

What happens after you are done with training at a job that may or may not be your career? What happens when you've achieved nothing and everything in your life? What happens then? 

I don't suppose anyone has a clear answer to this, but for me, I would like to know. I know that I haven't achieved everything in my life. I am not a mother to any children and I know I want to be. I am not a wife to anyone, and I know I want to be one. I am a girlfriend of someone whom I love very much, but where does it become more? I am a daughter to a woman who didn't give me birth to me, and I am more or less a disappointment because I don't call often nor did I become a lawyer. I have experience in law, information technology, and healthcare but I am not any of those positions. 

I am more or less a customer service professional with an aptitude to do anything and everything. I can do a lot with the right training, but where does the effort end up going? 

I am an unpublished writer struggling to write anything nowadays because I no longer have the motivation or inspiration to do so. I am just me, going through the motions and wondering if anything I do is even worth it. 

I just don't know.

I am at a loss of what to do and where to go from here -- where is here? 

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