So, Mr J will be gone for a couple of weeks? He has a conference in the east coast and when he gets done with that, he has music festival he will be going to and right after that, he will be flying out to SLC for work and won't be back til 9/18 but turns around again and flies out 9/20 back to SLC... Yea, he travels a lot for his chosen profession, while I stay in town and commute to work M-F and occasionally I do overtime which means I lose a day of my weekend.
Yet, the reason why I'm writing this --- before Mr J, I met L. L and I also had chemistry, but the main difference between L and J is even though J is bad at communicating, he is trying. I would like to talk to Mr J more even though most of my work involves being on the phone all day and frankly, I dislike small talk. But even if Mr J was talking to me about the weather or something as mundane as that subject, the sound of his voice makes my heart beat just a little faster. I love the way he enfolds me in his arms and makes me feel safe. I love his surprise lick attacks. I love how he holds my hands when we are watching s movie, a TV show...I love how he lays his head on my lap to take a nap. I love that mysterious smile of his.
I can talk about Mr J for hours on end. But I'm still learning things about him. He makes me think to no end. This Saturday, I would have known Mr J for three months.
In the short span of the last few months, I have come to know a lot about him. And he has come to know a lot about me. And I know I shared a secret or two and I don't know if I should have, but I know that I feel lighter somehow.
I wish I knew what was going on in his head. Sometimes, I wish I understood why I feel the way I do. It's a puzzle. I respond to him like no other. Mr J stimulates my mind and my body ...well, I know I'm his. And no one else.
And right now, I just want to talk to him. I want to hear his voice. I never knew a bed could feel so empty. I'm sprawled diagonally on it, and I wish I had his arms around me.